Part 2: They Are Not Your Feelings
In part 1 I said that this part would contain a recipe on how to dissolve your present relationship with emotions and start seeing them in a new light. So continue to read on with this in mind: When I understand the following I have the power to fully understand emotions and respond to them in a new way.
I don’t know about you, but in my life there is generally not a single moment where I feel nothing. Emotions are ever present in my life. The words we use to describe these emotions are generally always phrased in a way that claims the emotions. YOU ARE feeling something. As if you become the emotions. Something happened to you and suddenly the feelings take over and you become them. Someone makes you angry or happy.
The second you use words that makes you identify with the emotions that are felt the distance between you and what is felt is erased. Try to understand that the mind is very concerned with maintaining your identity. It is probably the single greatest motivator for you. If you can convince yourself that being a millionaire or being poor is part of your identity your mind will do whatever it takes to make sure you live externally in accordance with your identity.
With this in mind try to see the depth of what happens when you identify with an emotion through saying ‘I am angry, I am happy etc.’ The mind will have no choice but to start behaving in a way that is congruent with your relationship to happiness or being angry. That is why emotions take control. It is not that they are so powerful and intense that you lose control. The control is very much exercised through a choice to identify with the emotion. It is obviously not a conscious choice, but a choice nonetheless.
The distance between you and the emotions is closed the moment you identify with it. Essentially the emotion is not designed to become you. You have a body that has the capacity to experience a wonderful array of emotions, however that does not mean that you become them. The emotions have no intention of becoming you quite the opposite. The natural process of emotions is to visit and gently or intensely communicate a message to you. The moment you make it about you, you miss all of what is given to you.
Emotions are simply gifts given to you and the moment you receive it, it dissolves. The moment you receive emotions they have the opportunity to leave again. However when they are trapped in identification they cannot leave and they are never heard.
If you get nothing else from this, understand this. You are not your emotions, you cannot be and you never were. Love may visit and it will leave. Identifying with emotions will make you miss the greatest gift there is. A small implication of identifying with emotions is that you don’t feel the emotions on any significant level; you only feel how you feel about the emotion. A relationship that was forged when you were an infant. It is stale and dead, it doesn’t evolve or change. One of the most important ways to experience the world is based on something dead, something that does not change. The identification stops you from experiencing new things in a significant way. You become happy, sad, frustrated etc. by the same things day in and day out.
The amount of potential there is in changing a few words and becoming aware of how it affects you.
You are not happy there is happiness!